{"id":548,"date":"2021-01-18T08:22:13","date_gmt":"2021-01-18T00:22:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/120.24.183.239\/?p=548"},"modified":"2024-12-09T21:13:32","modified_gmt":"2024-12-09T13:13:32","slug":"mengjing-aidesikao","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/austinzhang.com\/?p=548","title":{"rendered":"\u5922\u5883-\u611b\u7684\u601d\u8003 Dreams – Reflections on Love”"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

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In a farm in southeastern Iceland, a family of four lives: a couple and their daughter, who is in her first year of university. They manage a 1,000-acre farm with grasslands, glaciers, 200 sheep, a few horses, and many ducks, cats, and dogs. From their window, they can see the farm and their cozy home. The daughter tells me that she wants to marry someone who loves this farm. With such a small population in Iceland, where 90% live in the capital, who would want to live here? It must be a call of love\u2014someone who marries this girl and is willing to spend a lifetime on a farm far from the city.<\/p>\n

What is love? No one can define it precisely because everyone experiences love differently, with varying degrees of being loved and different environments and histories. However, one thing is certain: everyone’s love for their parents and ancestors is the same. It is a selfless love, a devoted love, a pure and instinctual love. Sibling love should be the same.<\/p>\n

Beyond this kind of love, there are countless forms of love\u2014between spouses, children, friends, and lovers\u2014but none can compare to the love of parents and ancestors. The complexity of other loves can be overwhelming, leading me to a point where I struggled to understand love. I began a long contemplation: Who should I love? How should I love? What is the purpose of love? How long does love last? What are the reasons for not loving? Can love cause harm?<\/p>\n

Love is an intense focus on, attachment to, care for, and nurturing of another person. True love should be selfless and not seek reward. If love becomes an exchange or a conditional relationship, its essence is distorted. Love must have a counterpart, the one who is loved; there cannot be love without a target. When the loved one understands the meaning of love, it becomes a mutual understanding, a gratitude that, while not a prerequisite, is a signal for lasting love. This kind of love is worth it. I believe love cannot be demanded; the notion that the amount of love given will be reciprocated is not true love, but rather an emotional exchange or transaction. In the long journey of love, its weight cannot be measured, nor can it be evaluated as a simple exchange of love and lack thereof. Love transcends physicality, becoming a spiritual force characterized by the desire to give everything to the beloved.<\/p>\n

Love is thus persistent and fearless. It is an opportunity, something that can be encountered but not sought; it is fate, everything happens according to destiny; it is a fragrance, a scent that permeates the heart and lungs; it is a gaze, a connection that seems divinely crafted. In the vast sea of humanity, with stars filling the sky, each person is but a speck of dust\u2014what are the chances of meeting? The answer is known without thought. Thus, people often say, “fate,” but what is fate? No one can articulate it. It simply exists when it should.<\/p>\n

This is how love happens: who to love and how to love becomes clear. As for the purpose of love, perhaps no one can explain it clearly. How long love lasts and the reasons for not loving depend on the interplay between those who love and those who are loved. I do not believe love leads to harm unless it comes with conditions. When love becomes a matter of exchange, the principle of fairness is violated, which may lead to harm; otherwise, love itself should not cause suffering.<\/p>\n

In this small house on the farm in southeastern Iceland, I recall many past events and dream of the future. Such a scene may only exist in my dreams. If a person lives only in reality, all pursuits of perfection will merely become fantasies. Dreams make me happy because they allow me to realize people and events that cannot be achieved in reality. I often remind myself that I cannot step out of the dream unless there is someone in reality who can lead me out of it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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